Battered

Battered, broken,
I lie here now,
my soul in tatters,
my dignity lost,
never to be reclaimed.

I have given up.
Never shall this dream come to be,
never shall I succeed here.
My time and effort have been wasted.

I stare at my ceiling
daring it to mock my pain.
Silently I ask for answers
from an unresponsive God.
My heartfelt pleas go unanswered
inciting my buried anger.

I blame myself, the world, God
to no avail
for it will not give me my heart's desire.
I continue hunting for success
for wallowing in my failure
brings me only shame.